| If you want to say: | Instead, say: |
| F*ck you. | Thank you. |
| What kind of idiot are you? Nobody could get that out of what I wrote. | I hadn’t thought of it that way. |
| I can’t believe you wrote that on the INTERNET, where everybody can read it! Take it down right now, or I’ll sue! | I’m glad you shared your perspective with me. |
| Just because YOU had a difficult childhood doesn’t mean MY character did – you’re reading into it. | I appreciate your insight. |
| You don’t deserve to read my stories. | I’m grateful you took the time and energy to share your opinion. |
| F*ck you and all of your agent and editor friends. You’re all in it together – a closed club. | I hope I can resubmit/come to you for feedback again. |
| I have never read something so MEAN as what you said about my work! | Your candor is refreshing. |
| I can’t even figure out what you meant in your comments. Learn to write! | I will consider carefully what you said. |
| You’re so f*cking nit-picky. | The specifics you pointed out are helpful. |
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